The Renewal: Through the Eyes of Steven Hyde
by yabookreader96
Summary: This is a companion to my story "The Renewal," the story of what happens with Jackie and Hyde the summer that Donna and Kelso are in California. "The Renewal" is the main story, narrated from the perspective of the one and only Jackie Burkhart. This is a slightly condensed version of the story told through Hyde's perspective. I recommend reading "The Renewal" first. Enjoy!
1. Stinky Fish

This is a companion to my story "The Renewal," a Jackie and Hyde fanfiction about the summer they got together when Donna and Kelso were in California. "The Renewal" is narrated from Jackie's perspective, and this companion is the same story, except slightly more condensed and written in the perspective of Hyde. This piece is not meant to be read as a stand alone, and only once "The Renewal" has been read would I recommend reading this companion. If you have read "The Renewal", I really hope you'll read this because it gives some insight to Hyde's view of many of the events that happen in my story. If you want to read "The Renewal," here is the link.

Disclaimer:I own none of the characters of That '70s Show. Nor do I own the intrinsic plot lines of the Jackie and Hyde relationship starting over the summer that Kelso and Donna were in California, or of the odd dynamic between Fez and Fenton. I do not own some of the character dialogue toward the end of this manuscript, it is straight from episode 1 and 2 of season five of the show. Certain parts of the manuscript were based off of past seasons, which I also have no ownership of. All this is accredited to the owners of the television show: The Carsey-Werner Company, LLC. All that I own is the sub-plot of this story and the text of this manuscript (besides that taken directly from the show).

NOTE: Also, a huge shout out to nellies5446 for encouraging to write something form Hyde's point of view. I am so incredibly blessed to have you as a fan of my story, "The Renewal," so this one is for you. Here is the first chapter...

o-o-o-o-o

Most people would leave a bucket of dead, offensive and foul-smelling fish they found in an empty parking lot right where it was. I, on the other hand, never missed an opportunity to capitalize on ruining someone's day.

It was simply a matter of who. And when the hubcap fell off of Kelso's tire, I knew it was meant to be. It was for him.

I recruited Fez, because, you know…the more the merrier when it came to burning Kelso. However, our plan had trouble coming to fruition when not only Kelso, but Jackie, Forman, Donna and Casey all showed up in the Forman's driveway, where Kelso's van also happened to be.

What went down next with Forman, Donna and Casey was a lot more foul then my dead fish. And then, when Kelso and Jackie found out that they weren't allowed to go inside and 'smell the fish', so to speak, they got into Kelso's van, and headed for the Hub, leaving me and Fez with the fish.

"Well, there goes that plan," Fez says now, shrugging and sitting on one of the porch chairs.

"No way, man. You can't give up that easily. We're going to the Hub," I take the bucket of fish and tie it into a garbage bag so that it wouldn't spill in the Camino.

"I don't know, Hyde. What if we get caught?" Fez worries his bottom lip. "We already almost did."

"No way man. Kelso and Jackie are on a mission to get back together, remember? Kelso gets to kiss another girl at the Hub or whatever, and you know that Jackie is going to keep putting that off. We have plenty of time," I open the driver's door of the Camino.

"Okay," Fez decides, standing up. "Let me just go downstairs and get my candy before we go."

"Whoa, whoa. Fez," he turns back to face me. "Not that much time."

Fez nods sadly, but gets into the car without another word.

We find Kelso's van in the parking lot behind the Hub. Parked next to it is Jackie's car, and I'm almost tempted to put some of the fish in her tires. I decide against it however. The Lincoln was too nice.(1)

I get the fish out of the bed of the Camino and open it up. The harsh, coarse smell of death and decay wafts out of the bag and up my nostrils.

Nobody ever said burning Kelso would be easy.

I shift the bucket between Fez and I and we lean over the tire. I remove the hubcap and begin to fill the depression with dead fish.

We are interrupted again, however, when we hear footsteps racing up behind us.

"Michael and I are getting married!" Jackie runs up to us.

Crap. She probably wondered what we were doing with dead fish kneeling over her fiancé's van. I mumble some excuse, but I don't think she even notices what we're doing because she quickly jumps into her car and races out of the lot.

"They're getting married?" Fez exclaims, the fish he was holding slipping out of his grasp and back in the bucket.

"Who cares man?" I start to fit the hubcap back into place. "Jackie just left so Kelso will be coming soon. We need to fill the rest of these before he gets out there."

We quickly fill the three other hubcaps with our putrid fish. Then at the risk of getting caught, I secure each of the hubcaps into place for good measure.

"Let's go back to Forman's man. See what's up with him," I say once I've finished.

Fez stands up as well, grinning from ear to ear. "I can't wait to see Kelso's reaction."

o-o-o-o-o

As we would come to find out, we'd never get to know Kelso's reaction. That however, was a small, insignificant detail in comparison when the real drama unfolded.

"Wait, what's going on here?" I asked, getting comfortable on the bar stool in the kitchen when Fez and I returned. Forman and Donna were nowhere to be found, instead, the kitchen was filled with the grave faces of their parents…and Jackie.

And the room is silent. It almost made me sorry I asked. Just when the silence began ringing in my ears however, Red speaks. "Donna is living in California with her mother."

At this same exact moment Forman comes through the swinging kitchen door. He stops in his tracks. "What?"

"Uh oh," I comment.

Forman briefly glances at me before looking back at his father. "Donna's in California? Oh man, this is all my fault." Now he looks at the ground.

"Is this because you wouldn't take Donna back after she dated Casey?" Red never tolerated Forman's idiocy, especially when it came to Donna.

"You what?" Jackie growls at Forman.

He points back at her, the only defiance left in him flaring up now. "Don't start with me. You were the one to set her up with Casey!"

"Yeah, because you dumped her!" Jackie negates.

Mrs. Forman manages to get everyone to cool off again, however it proves to be a futile arrangement when the telephone rings. From my seat, I can actually feel the tension in the room coil up again.

And when that coil springs, all of its energy is aimed forcefully at one person, practically knocking them right off their feet.

Mrs. Forman's voice is the coil whistling through the air as it hones in on its target. "Donna wanted me to tell you that…Michael is with her on the way to California."

The coil hits its target right in the center of the chest. It's Jackie.

o-o-o-o-o

Mrs. Forman sends everyone away so she can talk to her. I'm sent to the basement.

My hand wavers over the paper bag. But in the end I decide against it. It was against my better judgment and belief to run away from your problems. And I didn't want to be some even more pathetic version of Donna, or especially Kelso.

And anyways, the stash was for living life, not burying it.

And in the long run, I realized I was glad to have remained clearheaded. Because if I hadn't, I wouldn't have been able to remember the dead fish in Kelso's tires and how the stench would follow him out of Wisconsin and all the way to California.

Footnotes:

1 – Was it really the car Hyde was concerned about? ;D


	2. This Game

Okay. Chapter 2. I'm sorry it took so long. Unlike the original story, which is told through Jackie's perspective, I have not fully written this one already. I will publish the chapters as I finish writing and editing them. Right now I have a lot going on with the end of the semester and finals, but I have Thanksgiving break starting this Wednesday, so I'll get a couple extra days to work on this. Hopefully then I can whip out some more chapters. So I apologize for any delay. Now, here is chapter 2.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Steven, will you come here please?" Mrs. Forman calls me back up, no more than five minutes later.

I climb up the stairs, wondering what she needed me for, so soon after she sent me away. "Yeah, Mrs. Forman?"

"Steven, can you do me a little favor?" she asks when I reach the landing.

"Yeah, anything you need."

Which was true. If I was capable, I'd do anything Mrs. Forman needed me to do. And unfortunately, driving Jackie home was something I was capable of doing. So of course, that meant I would do it, even though I was biting my lip about it. I really wasn't in the mood for her moping about Kelso.

However, after almost the entire drive to her house without her saying a thing about Kelso, I was too curious to let it go.

"What, no quips about Kelso? Or Forman making Donna leave? No pity party?" I taunt.

Nothing. Crap. I sigh. "Okay, you know what, man? He probably left with Donna thinking they were just going to Fatso Burger." I don't know why I feel the need to console her.

"I don't think so," she says so quietly I almost miss it.

"Okay, well, I'm sure he didn't leave because of you. The guy is crazy about you."

"It's not even him. A guy who runs off after getting engaged is not the kind of guy I want to be with. It's Donna who I miss."

I have to admire her stubbornness. But something else catches my immediate attention.

"Whoa, hold up… You guys really got engaged?" I really hadn't believed her when she came out of the Hub. "I thought you were kidding back there. Okay, even _you've _got to appreciate that good burn."

Something told me though that it would have been even funnier if this had happened to someone else.

"You know, you can be a real jerk sometimes," she says with a look of pure hatred and a little hurt, which I try to ignore along with the small feeling of guilt in my side.

"That's why they keep me around," I smile impishly. At least the old Jackie was back. "Okay. We are here."

"Thanks," she says immediately, and darts out of the car just as quickly. Her small figure disappears out of my headlights, and then I back up and head back to the Forman's.

Mrs. Forman is still cleaning the kitchen when I get back. "Where's Eric?" I ask her.

"He went to bed," she shakes her head ruefully, and I can tell she has no idea what she can do for him. I watch as she takes her anger out on her stove with a pad of steel wool.

I glance at the clock. It was only nine o'clock. _Forman_, I sigh internally.

"You know," Mrs. Forman pauses in her scrubbing and looks up at me. "Donna came by again after Casey left. Then she left and Eric went to wait for her. The only reason he was home when Bob and Jackie came over was because I sent Red over there to make him come home. Then he finds out about Donna leaving and just goes to bed…" she shakes her head, eyes wild as she stares off into the distance at nothing.

"I just wish Eric would realize that there are other people besides Donna who love and care about him," she looks up at me pleadingly.

I don't know what to do. Mrs. Forman was one hundred and ten percent right, and Forman was a weakling. But now was one of the times where I couldn't do something to help my 'substitute' mom. And now_ I_ felt helpless.

But I still did what I could. Although it didn't work the last time, the next morning, Fez and I tried to persuade Forman to stop being a low-life and go to Funland with us.

"Forman, we're coming in," I rasp on the door a couple of times before pushing it open.

The lights in his room were off, and the blinds were drawn. I have to take off my shades, and then still wait some before my eyes adjust to the darkness. Eventually I can make out a lumped figure in the bed.

"Forman, get out of bed, come on man," I sit on the edge of his bed and give him a good shove.

"Leave me alone Hyde," Forman mumbles from somewhere beneath the covers.

"I brought candy," Fez says cheerily. I can't see him too well, but I hear him shake the giant bag he'd brought over.

Forman doesn't even dignify this with a response.

"Come on man, we we're going to Funland and you're coming with us," I shoot straight to the punch line. Forman just groans.

Then in bursts Jackie, in full on bossy mode. "Ugh, you guys need help. Do you honestly think Eric's in any mood to go to Funland? You go there when you want to have fun. And you feel too guilty to have fun, right Eric?"

Now Forman swings his head out from under the covers. He looks back and forth between the three of us. "Yes. Exactly."

Jackie gives Fez and me a look of vain content. How was this the same person that I drove home last night? She had been just as despondent as Forman, and now she was busting with confidence. If I hadn't known any better I would've thought it was hot.

And then to my utter astonishment, Jackie manages to get Forman to agree to get up out of bed and get out of the house. Unfortunately, it was without the promise of Funland. On the other hand, it did involve alcohol, so I was all for it.

We end up at Jackie's house, of all places. I was already beginning to regret this. How did my day go from Funland to the home of a snobby rich kid?

And her home was just as snobby as she was. I hadn't been here in a while, and I forgot how big it actually was. Even her basement was huge. That plus the fact that it was furnished definitely put Forman's to complete shame. It also made me very uncomfortable.

Jackie leads us to the wine cellar and immediately begins to pull out some glasses. She sets them out in front of all of us and then begins rifling through bottles of wine, vodka and the works.

She pulls out everything she needs to make the Amaretto Stone Sour. "Here, Eric, you can be my guinea pig. Tell me what you think," she slides her first drink over to him.

We all watch as Forman takes a tentative sip. He swallows and stares at the glass for a minute. Then he nods his head. "Yeah, I could get used to this."

Jackie smiles cheerily and moves on to her next drink. "Ooh, me next," Fez raises his hand.

"Sure Fez," Jackie laughs, moving back to her work.

By the time that Fez gets his drink, Forman is halfway finished with his. And its completely gone before Jackie even finishes mine.

"Jackie, why would my mom teach you this? She had to know that you'd just go home and make yourself a drink," he sets his empty glass on the counter.

She looks up from my drink to Forman. "Easy. I was sad, and no one can seem to stand it when I'm sad. It's probably because I'm so beautiful," she flips her hair over her shoulder ostentatiously. "And she thought I was too innocent to stoop to underage drinking."

"Innocent," I say in disbelief. "You've done a lot more that underage drinking."

She slides my finished drink over. "Some of that is your fault."

I glance up at her, surprised to hear that come out of her mouth. After she got back together with Kelso, it was like that annoying crush she had on me had never happened. I was glad, but I still find it surprising that she would acknowledge it now so casually.

Her eyes on the other hand, held mine with a sudden dark intensity that betrayed her indifferent tone of voice.

I lean back in my seat, putting as much distance between the two of us as I can. "Alright, Forman. You ready for Funland now?"

o-o-o

"We get into a crash and it's your car you're worried about? Not your life? My life? Their lives?" I couldn't believe how obsessed Jackie was with her car.

"I have put hours of hard work into this car," she says poignantly, crossing her arms. "So yes, I'm worried about my car. Especially with _you_ driving it."

"Hey, I drive my Camino and I don't scratch it. Fez is the one you shouldn't trust behind the wheel," I remember the time I tried teaching him to drive my car. That was a disaster. Poor Leo…

"I don't trust anyone with my car," Jackie continues.

"Then why am I driving it?" I ask. I mean, I knew I was driving because I was the only one who knew the way to Funland, but I felt like giving her a hard time. "And might I add, this isn't the first time you put me behind the wheel of your Lincoln either. Actually, it's the third."

This time I'm the one to catch her off guard. Jackie looks at me, suddenly speechless. She quickly tries to recover her shock, but I can still see how it surprised her that I would subtly bring up prom and our one date.

Yeah, two could play at this game.

Any satisfaction I got out of this, however, was completely destroyed before we even got on the first ride.

"You know, I'm beginning to think nobody wants to sit with me," Jackie starts to make a scene when Forman and Fez start arguing over who gets to sit with me on the rides.

"Really, you just got that? Get with the program, lady," Fez says, still heated from his dispute with Forman.

"Who has to sit with Jackie?" Forman says fast. "Noses. Not it," he brings his finger to his nose.

Fez takes a moment to follow. "Wait, not it, sorry Hyde, you're stuck with Jackie."

I hadn't been paying too much attention, and I really only focus in on what was happening when Fez says this just now.

"What? Are we in third grade again?" I try to brush it off.

"We are," Forman says, dead serious. "But you can prove that you're not by sitting with Jackie and taking the fall for us," he grins.

"Seriously? I pay for the gas and all our tickets, and this is how I get treated? That's real nice," Jackie continues her mini-tantrum. She doesn't look upset though.

"Hey, that's the reason we brought you along, money bags," I say at the same time I realize that she _should_ be upset about this. We were kind of be assholes to her, but she didn't care because she was used to people using her for her money.

This time, though, I've probably taken it too far, because she really does look taken aback. "So, I'm the wallet," she says, realization crossing her features.

"Oh, crap. Fine. I want to sit with Jackie," I force the words out of my mouth. (1) "And you two babies sit together. Now Jackie, will you please stop making a scene?"

"Thank you, Hyde. And, no, I will not stop making a scene," Jackie crosses her arms triumphantly and leads the rest of us off to the rides.

o-o-o

Sitting with Jackie on all the rides actually turned out to not be as bad as I had originally thought it was going to be. At one point, I actually felt bad that Fez was stuck with Forman.

Apparently, the last time Forman had been to Funland was also the last time that he'd been to a real amusement park, because he was screaming like a baby on most of the rides. Jackie, on the other hand, was hardly fazed by the lunging falls and dizzying spins.

After we get off of one of the largest coasters in the park, I have to suppress from laughing when I see Forman and Fez. Forman looked so green that he could puke, and Fez was rubbing his ears, a pained expression on his face.

Standing next, to me, Jackie actually looked bored.

"Aye, I think my eardrum might've popped," Fez whines. Oddly, this is what makes Jackie smile.

"Aww, was that ride too scary for you Eric?" Jackie laughs at him.

Too dazed to properly respond to her insult, Forman sits down on a nearby bench.

"I think…I think I need to stick to some of the smaller rides," Forman manages.

"Not the House of Mirrors," Jackie says suddenly. Forman looks at her funny and she shrugs. "Its disappointing. Not enough mirrors." (2)

"No. I was thinking more along the lines of…" Forman looks around at the rides. Then he points to one on his right. "The Tire Toss. That doesn't look to bad."

Before I know it, we are climbing into one of the 4-person cabins of The Tire Toss. Fez, not wanting to risk sitting next to Jackie, quickly sits on one bench with Forman, although he surveys the ride, obviously wondering if this too would make Forman scream at the top of his lungs.

"Ooh, I love this song," Jackie bellows as some Donny Osmond song I don't recognize starts to play on the ride's speakers.

This distracts Fez from his survey and he quickly joins Jackie in singing way off key.

Meanwhile, Forman is sitting there across from me, rubbing his hands, clearly trying to brace himself for any 'curveballs' that this ride might toss at him.

"Forman, relax," I tell him. "This ride is just…" I am cut off by the carney who comes to fasten our seatbelts. I glance down and notice that it is just one giant seatbelt. Not two individual ones. The carney tightens the belt, forcing Jackie and I to sit snuggly together in the middle of the bench.

Suddenly I didn't like this ride so much anymore.

By the middle of the ride, the centrifugal force had made it so Jackie and I were sitting together one half of the bench, while the other half was completely empty.

I tried to distract myself by looking at the similarly intimate figures of Forman and Fez. It was actually kind of funny, but it wasn't working. Every nerve of my body was on fire from where Jackie was next to me and I couldn't freaking ignore it.

I'd accepted a while ago that I didn't hate Jackie, and that I never actually did, despite the fact that for a long time, I really wanted to hate her. I couldn't let that escalate into my trying to convince myself that I didn't like her. There was no way in hell that I could ever let that happen. I'd overstepped that boundary once, when I was idiotic enough to kiss her. But that made me realize that I needed to set a boundary, both in the figurative and literal sense. And right now, this ride was _literally _not helping with that.

When the ride begins to slow to a stop, Jackie is able to gain enough strength to pull herself back upright away from me. She seems completely unfazed, however, and is instead laughing hysterically at Forman, who not surprisingly, looks completely sick from this ride as well.

Its not until the ride completely stops that Forman gets the color back in his skin. I do my best to ignore the tiny figure bouncing giddily in the seat next to me.

"So, Forman, are you glad we came to Funland?" I ask him. I was ninety percent making fun of him, but a small part of me really did hope that this would help him get over Donna.

"Yeah, I guess man," Forman shrugs, kicking me in the shin. "You know Hyde, you act all tough, but you really do care about me," he pretends to cry.

"Shut up man," I say, slightly aggravated. "And don't kick me. My arm already hurts from Jackie's shoulder ramming into it on this ride," I say, more to convince myself that Jackie's close contact had bothered me for this particular reason, and not any other.

Forman tosses Jackie a triumphant smile. "She learned from the best. Now you know what its like when you frogg us, buddy."

I shake my head at him. "Didn't I tell you to shut up Forman?"

Fez complains about getting food, and suddenly I'm anxious to get out of here as well. "Yeah, if the carney ever lets us out of this damn ride," I shake the metal lap bar.

"Poor Hyde. Feel like a caged animal buddy?" Forman, suddenly over his bout of sickness grins at me, taking way to much pleasure out of this.

"Forman I swear to God, I'm gonna kick your – ".

"Okay kids, let's use only fun language at Funland," the carney shows, up, interrupting me.

We are released from the ride, the carney's words echoing in my mind. For some reason I'm reminded of that disgusting Funland dog from our last visit. "I don't know how much longer I can keep coming back here," I mutter, mostly to myself.

Jackie overhears. "Aww, but its always fun o'clock in Funland!"

"Watch it," I mutter in an undertone.

"Ooh, I loved that song," Fez starts up too. "Fun, fun, fun, fun…" he sings.

"What the hell are you guys talking about?" Forman asks.

I pat him on the back. "You don't want to know, man. Now, let's get out of here."

o-o-o

I don't know where along the line Jackie became a member of our group, instead of just Kelso's girlfriend. It was like, one day she was just Kelso's girlfriend, and the next, she was coming to a Todd Rundgren concert and hasn't left since.

Even after that though, it was easy to pretend that she was just around because of Kelso. I hadn't realized that she had become one of us until she broken up with him right before prom and still kept coming over to hang out in the basement. That wasn't the only thing I realized either. She was also a lot less annoying and a lot more tolerable during those periods when she wasn't with Kelso. At first I thought it was a good thing, which is how I ended up taking her to Junior prom.

But that night also made me realize something. When Jackie wasn't with Kelso, it was a whole lot easier to be friends with her. In fact, it was hard not to. And trust, me, if anyone knew that, it was me. I slipped when I brought her to prom. I slipped again when I took the fall for her stash. Then I slipped again when I took her on a date that Veteran's Day.

Now with Kelso gone again, I knew enough by now to tell I was already slipping again. But somehow, despite the fact that I knew this, I couldn't stop myself from making Forman, Fez and I split the bill at dinner because it wasn't fair to Jackie to have to pay for that too. Until today, I wouldn't have cared. And suddenly I did again.

I didn't relax again until much later when I lay in bed in the basement.

My own private solitude.

o-o-o-o-o

Footnotes:

1 – In writing this (both in the original story and this version), I thought about that time that Jackie took Hyde to the mall (you know, when she bought him new boots?). She got upset when Hyde told her that this was a "one time thing." When he sees that Jackie is upset, he immediately tries to console her for hurting her feelings. I tried to replicate this behavior of his in this scene.

2 – I'm sure that you, as the reader know that Jackie is referring to her last visit to Funland here. But, I had to include this just in case anybody was wondering what that was about.


	3. Peace and Quiet

"Mrs. Forman," I announce as I arrive in the kitchen for breakfast. "Your son isn't getting up."

Mrs. Forman, who had been stirring a bowl of pancake mix, now looks at me in disbelief. She opens her mouth to say something, but decides against it. "I just don't get it," she says after a moment. She begins to viciously stir the pancake mix. "It's like Donna was the only person who mattered to Eric."

"Kitty. He's a dumb-ass, okay?" Red says, peering over his newspaper at the kitchen table to look at his wife.

Mrs. Forman just shakes her head at her husband, obviously not impressed with his explanation.

"Well, anyways. I tried to get him up, but… it was a no go," I pat her on the shoulder and join Red at the table.

"Well, there is no need for you to apologize, sweetie. It just means that you've earned yourself twice as many pancakes, seeing as I made enough batter for four people," Mrs. Forman gives me a winning smile, but I can tell that it's forced.

After a few minutes, Mrs. Forman sets a large plate of pancakes in front of me. "There's more where that came from," she waggles her eyebrows.

"Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry," says a new voice from behind me. I don't have to turn to know who it is. Jackie. "I'll come back later."

"Right you will," Red tilts his chin up.

"Oh, nonsense Red," Kitty quickly heads back into the kitchen. "We have enough food to feed another mouth. It's early, I doubt you've had a real breakfast yet."

Jackie politely refuses again, but eventually Mrs. Forman drags her into Forman's seat and gives her a dish.

Well, there goes my second serving.

Jackie stares, guilt-ridden at her pancakes. If she didn't want to intrude on breakfast, then why did she come so early? It seemed as though she were spending more time here then before Donna and Kelso left. In fact, she was spending as much time at the Forman house as I was when Edna had first disappeared. Jackie however… I had no idea what her reasons were.

"Are you sure he's just not like, really tired?" Jackie asks Mrs. Forman, referring to Forman's absence.

Mrs. Forman, I know, had not accepted the reality of her son's current state. "Forman is a weakling," I explain to Jackie. "Without Donna, he's a hopeless cause."

Mrs. Forman sighs and Red mutters more profanities under his breath. Jackie just changes the subject.

"Political conventions?" Red narrows his eyes to Jackie's sudden topic change. "You're going to have to be a little more specific than that. What kind of political conventions?"

"Well, I don't know," she admits. "I don't do politics. I guess, the kind that my dad might be involved in."

I have to suppress an eye roll.

"Your father's the City Councilman, right?" Red asks.

Jackie looks totally lost. "I told you, I don't do politics. I do shopping, money and make-up. In that order."

"Then why are you interested in politics?" I taunt.

"Mr. Forman?" she ignores me.

Red feeds her some basic information about politics. I zone out. Whatever Jackie was up to, it was none of my business (1).

o-o-o-o-o

"I've never been in this store before," Jackie scrunches her nose at the tacky rainbow tiled floors of the candy store at the mall.

I pick up a giant gummy-bear lollipop. "Hey Fez, this is going to be you one day," I laugh and hand it over to him.

"Hey, how do you know what I dreamed last night?" Fez practically flushes.

"What?" I grimace.

"Never mind," Fez says cautiously. Then he turns to Jackie. "How much money can I spend?"

"Let's see," Jackie pulls her wallet out. "My father gave me $150 today. So…what's that, $50 each?" Jackie nods.

Fez is slack-jawed. Jackie glances at me. "Is he okay?"

"Just give him a minute," I poke Fez in the shoulder. Nothing. "Jackie. There is no way you are spending $50 on each of us."

Immediately, she pouts. "But I want to. You wouldn't understand because, you're, no offense, poor, but it feels so good to spend money sometimes," she looks far away.

I snap my fingers in her face. "Jackie. You in there?"

She focuses back on me. "So what do you want? Candy?"

"Yes," Fez says, dreamily.

"No," I say at the same time.

"Ughh!" Jackie looks like she could choke both of us. "Fez. Here. Take this fifty. And you," she points to me. "What do you want?" she yells.

I cross my arms.

Fez only buys about thirty dollars-worth of candy, which disappoints Jackie beyond belief. She quit talking to me altogether, which didn't bother me.

Regardless, when she drags us into a clothing department store, to shop for herself, she first dives into the men's section. I don't realize what she's up to until I see her make a bee-line for a rack of band t-shirts.

"Alright," she says. "You either pick them yourself, or I'm buying you a ton of ABBA t-shirts." She doesn't have to say my name, its obvious who she's talking to.

Jackie crosses her arms behind her back and stares me down.

"Fine," I say after a moment, but only because I knew that she meant it. She would by me ABBA shirts, and then she'd tell Mrs. Forman, and Mrs. Forman would make me wear it. And I knew I couldn't disappoint Mrs. Forman; like how on my eighteenth birthday I wore that sweater she knitted me, just to make her happy.

But this wasn't Mrs. Forman. It was Jackie. Mrs. Forman wouldn't care what Jackie bought for me. I move my hand away from the rack, ready to tell her no, again. But when I turn around, Jackie has this completely innocent and delighted look on her face. And all of a sudden I can't disappoint her either. She was happy to be doing something nice. I sigh.

And then: I can't help it. I can't stop it. All of a sudden, the memory of my birthday 'present' from Jackie flickers across the back of my vision (2). Something about that makes me turn back around to the t-shirts. I pull one off the hanger.

o-o-o-o-o

"Heidi?" Jackie begins to laugh hysterically.

"Yes, Eric, Hyde and Kelso all have female alternative names. Erica, Heidi and Michelle," Fez laughs. Then on a more serious note, "But there's none for me," he says proudly.

I lean forward in my chair. "That's because no one can pronounce your name," I give him a wicked grin. Fez gives me a warning look.

"Well," Jackie steeples her hands. "'Steven' doesn't have a female alternative. Only your last name does," she looks at me. "But I like Heidi. I think I'll start calling you that."

Oh, two could play at that game. I turn my wicked grin on Jackie.

"Do that and you'll become Jack," I threaten. That gives me an idea. I do my best not to laugh, less I break character. "Or Beulah."

Jackie's smile falls and her face pales. "Take that back, Heidi," she snaps

"No way, Beulah."

"Fine, Steven," she crosses her arms.

"Okay, Jackie," I turn my attention away from her.

"You guys are so weird," Fez says.

A while later Mrs. Forman announces that dinner is almost ready. I wonder if Forman is going to be pathetic enough to skip out on dinner too. Probably. Fez has to go home, and I can tell Jackie is obviously disappointed that her dad didn't call for her too.

I swallow a wave of annoyance. At least Jackie had parent's to call her home…

Then I swallow a wave of personal disgust. Since when was I bothered by Bud and Edna not being in the picture? And more so, since when was I jealous of _Jackie_?

"It's Jackie. Is Donna there?" Jackie's voices abruptly pierces the sudden silence of the basement.

I think about what she just said. She just asked for Donna. I glance in her direction and am surprised to see that she is on the phone.

"Yeah, I'm the short, loud one," Jackie rolls her eyes. I can't help but chuckle and she tosses a magazine she was holding at me.

"No. No. I do NOT want to talk to Michael," Jackie says to whoever is on the other line. Well, at least that was something. Then, "Donna?" her eyes meet mine, and I can see them light up as she says our friend's name.

They begin to talk, and when Jackie turns to face the other way, I can tell it's because she wants privacy. So I focus my attention back on the TV.

"Steven," I hear my name whispered from behind me. It's Mrs. Forman. "When Jackie gets off the phone, tell her dinner is ready if she wants to stay."

"Okay Mrs. Forman," I tell her.

She turns to leave, but overhears Jackie. "Uh, I don't care if that jerk spends the rest of his life in Fez's native land being chased by monkeys and eating bamboo. I'm through with Michael."

Mrs. Forman looks to me, as if I have an explanation. I shrug my shoulders. I don't want to tell her it's Donna, less I completely misread the phone call. Anyways, Mrs. Forman doesn't catch it when Jackie says Donna's name either.

Mrs. Forman disappears upstairs. I try to focus back on the TV, but that becomes hard to do when Jackie starts speaking very sharply into the receiver.

"Well, I need my mom too, and she's never around either. I had my best friend instead, but now she's gone too."

Ouch. Man, I had to stop feeling sorry for Jackie. I didn't know what had gotten into me lately. Well, on second thought, I worry that do know what was happening and there was no way that I could let that happen.

Suddenly Jackie drops the phone. After a moment she buries her head in her face. Immediately, I feel guilty about what I was thinking.

Forman and I had become friends when I protected him from a bully. Fez and I became friends when I saved him from a janitor's closet. I was by no stretch a guy who was 'in touch with my feelings', seeing as I had none, but it was in my nature to protect and defend others when I had the ability to. I realized now that I'd done that for Jackie a lot in the past too(3).

I pick up the phone and hang it back on it's receiver.

"Come on, Jackie," I say. Not harshly.

Jackie glances up at me as though she forgot I was down here. "Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot you were here."

Her face was red, but there were no tears in her eyes. I had to admit, she was a pretty tough cookie.

"Well, I do live here. And I sleep right down here," I say sneeringly. Maybe if I made her mad she wouldn't look so much like a damn sad puppy. It didn't work. "Sorry," I sigh. "Mrs. Forman told me that dinner was ready. She told me to wait for you to get off the phone."

"I was talking to Donna," she blurts. I know she's not really telling me, but rather, was telling herself. Perhaps if she voiced the words out loud they would make more sense.

I'm not really sure what to say. I don't know what happened during that phone call. So instead I just say "I know." It must work, because this is what gets her off the couch and following me up the stairs to the kitchen.

o-o-o

"So, you know why my host parent's called me home last night?" Fez was saying to Jackie as they arrived in the basement the following morning. "They're making me get a job this summer."

"Ooh," Jackie sits down on the couch and faces Fez. "You can take my job selling cheese.

"Yeah, Jackie's right man, you could pass for a cheese maiden," I chime in.

Fez shifts positions in the lawn chair. "Oh, enough with the female jokes, Hyde," he pouts.

"Well, I'm quitting anyway," Jackie continues talking about her cheese-selling job. "And in that time I would have been working, I'm going to write Michael a well-thought out letter of exactly how I felt about him leaving. Starting with how much of a coward he is," she smiles to herself.

"Hey, Fez is the one with the problem here," Fez points to himself.

"Right," Jackie says quickly.

"Look, man. Getting a job isn't all that terrible," I say before I realize what I've said. "Ugh, I need a beer."

"But, but remember that time I tried working at the Foto Hut with you and Leo? I got fired by Leo. By _Leo_," Fez emphasizes.

"Fez, that's because you need to get a job working at like, a jewelry store or something," I decide to grab a beer.

And that's how Fez and Jackie take off to find Fez a job at a jewelry store. I had been joking. Mostly. But I was glad to finally have some damn peace and quiet.

As soon as they leave, however, my mind becomes crowded with thoughts. Not exactly the quiet I was hoping for.

But something about what Fez had said had stuck in my head. The Foto Hut.

Within moments of Fez and Jackie leaving, I'm out of the basement too, grabbing my keys.

I could drive to the Foto Hut in my sleep. I had driven here almost every day for the past month or so. Leo always had disappeared for a few days at a time, but never had he been missing for this long. I often told myself that I would just drive to the Foto Hut to see if he was there and if he needed any help, but deep down, I knew that I was worried about him. Leo was never really all that stable to begin with(4).

I park the Camino in the small patch of dirt behind the small shack. I could already tell that he wasn't here, but that hadn't been stopping me from walking up to the chipped, blue-painted door and twisting the knob to see if it was unlocked. So far it hasn't been. It hadn't been stopping me from walking around to the front, resting my hands across the drive-thru window and looking inside, squinting my eyes in hopes of finding any movement. So far there hasn't been.

Today was no different.

Leo had officially been missing for a month.

That was the day I started growing my beard.

o-o-o

Back at the Forman's was an equally miserable scene. Red was at work. Mrs. Forman was taking a nap on the couch. Forman was still in his room, door partially shut, his light turned off.

I decide to head back downstairs, but before I do, I cover Mrs. Forman with a blanket slung over the back of the couch. The air-conditioning vent was positioned right above the couch.

In the basement however, I welcome the uncanny silence. Of course, because I am enjoying it, it is almost immediately taken away from me. Not seconds after I sit down in my chair, does an annoyingly chipper Jackie come bursting through the basement door.

"I got Fez a job. And then I walked to the other side of the mall and quit my job. What a successful day!"

"Where is Fez?" I do my best to ignore her hyper mood.

"Already working. You should have seen him, he fit right in. Although, I wouldn't be surprised if he wanted to start selling candy necklaces."

I chuckle bemusedly. "Yeah. You should tell him that. He'll be fired in a week."

Jackie quickly sobers up as she begins scribbling across a notepad. Within seconds she's lost in her own world, which is nice for me, because for the next few hours I get my peace and quiet.

Even once Fez gets back, four entire hours later, Jackie hasn't lifted her head from that notebook.

"What a wonderful day," Fez sits in the lawn chair, a giant grin on his face.

"So, man. How'd it go?" I ask, curious about his first day of work at a jewelry store, of all places.

"My boss," he blurts, then takes a sudden intake of breath.

"Man, that will never end well," I shake my head. "You better take a beer," I use my foot to slide a half-empty six pack across the table.

"Aye, I know," Fez frowns. "But she's so beautiful…" he stops and thinks. "But yes, its very nice. All the customers are great. And I really do enjoy helping them pick out jewelry."

"Of course you do," I say, not in the least bit surprised.

"And there's this one guy who works next door at the lingerie store. His name's Fenton, and he's always marching back and forth between the two stores. And I tell you, brother, he's not easy to like. He's the one downside to this job," Fez shakes his head.

Of course. "Yeah, man. There's always going to be that one guy that's out to get you. But you can't let him get under your skin Fez. If he does that it means your letting the corporate America brainwashed ninnies get to you."

"God forbid," Jackie says quietly, and suddenly.

"Welcome back, space cadet," I raise my eyebrows. "Where've you been for the past four hours?"

"Sitting on this couch," she says nonchalantly. "Fez, when did you get here?"

"Hmmm, about twenty minutes ago," Fez intertwines his fingers.

"Wow, where _have_ I been?" she looks down at her notebook.

"Anyways, I owe it to you guys," Fez continues telling his story "Hyde, for the idea of working in a jewelry store, and Jackie for finding the one for me. I found a job that I love, and now my host parents will get off my back. Cheers!"

Fez leans forward and pulls another beer from the six pack. I grab two more and toss one to Jackie.

I pull the tab on my can. "Here's to a grand freakin' summer."

"Amen to that, brother," Fez nods.

"Let's make it happen," Jackie nods and we all clack cans.

I don't know though. I don't know why I said that. I just don't.

o-o-o-o-o

Footnotes:

1 – Hyde has to convince himself that he doesn't care about Jackie's problem. But we all know that subconsciously, he's pretty curious. ;D

2 – I could just squeal thinking about how Jackie gives Hyde a kiss on his birthday. They're not even together, but the peck on his cheek is such a sweet gesture, and Hyde even gives her a little hug. Of course you all probably know all this. I apologize. This footnote is mostly just me fangirling…

3 – e.g., he comforted Jackie when she thought she'd never be loved again ("you'll find someone great, man"), took the blame for the marijuana so she wouldn't go to jail, told Fez to leave her alone when she was upset over breaking up with Kelso; three examples out of many. Hyde is now reflecting on these times.

I do want to point out however, that this does not mean Jackie 'needs' saving. On the contrary, actually. Jackie is actually very manipulative at times. More often than not, however, I admire Jackie's self-confidence and independence. Mostly my point here is just that it really is in Hyde's personality to protect others, probably because of how he was raised. But that's another story…

4 – Here I attempt to put something behind all of Leo's disappearances. By making it a habit of his, it adds more substance to when he disappears for an extended period in the later seasons. Especially when he goes back to his family towards the end of season five.


	4. Cabin Fever

I apologize for the long hiatus with updating this next chapter. I've had a lot going on and haven't had much opportunity to write, but I will NOT give up on this story. So...not a lot of new content in this chapter. It pretty much lines up with chapter 5 from The Renewal, except it tells what is going through Hyde's mind during these events. So please enjoy, there will be more NEW content in the next chapter.

Also, I have been working on a fairly short one-shot for Jackie and Hyde, and I will be sure to post that as soon as I have finished it and revised it. However, I want to keep writing Jackie and Hyde stories, but am short on ideas, so if anyone wants to make a specific request, I would greatly appreciate it! Just message me any ideas you have and I will soon get back to writing!

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

My proclamation of having a 'grand freakin' summer' was turning out to be a grand _lazy _summer. For the most part, things weren't all that different from before school got out and Donna and Kelso left. I still spent most my time in the basement, albeit a lot of that time was spent with Fez and unfortunately Jackie, but we never did anything all that much.

I hadn't ever thought that much about it, but most of the crazy stunts we pulled were masterminded by the recklessly stupid mind of Kelso, and Forman was typically our means of allowing all of that to happen. Without them…I just didn't have the motivation to paint the water tower or go to Canada to buy beer.

The only time we ever left now was to go to the Hub or, when it was just me, to check out the Foto Hut to look for Leo. Leo who was still absent. I broadened my search from the Foto Hut, and searched for Leo in some of his other bum hideouts, including all the alleys behind the Hub, Fatso Burger, and the Piggly Wiggly. But searching there had been discouraging as not only was Leo not there, but any signs of him were gone as well. No blankets left strewn across the pavement or small white papers trampled in the dirt.

So I continued to grow my beard. Nobody had said anything, or bothered asking, apart from Red who occasionally tossed a comment here and there about how it made me look even more like a dumbass. I always shrugged it off. He didn't know about its purpose, and I suspected that if he did, he'd begrudgingly respect it.

And with Leo gone, and the Foto Hut in remission, I was out of a job too, making the hazy summer days pass even longer. I refused to look for a new job, because submitting myself to that would mean accepting that Leo was gone for good this time, and I was about ready to do that. Not yet.

I checked on Forman a lot. He was here, and yet not here. Weeks passed, and I didn't know how we could still be up in his room. He had done this when he and Donna had first broken up, and I hadn't understood it then either. I'd drive myself crazy staying in my room all day every day by choice. So I did everything I could to force him out of bed, because frankly, I was getting cabin fever, and I needed some trouble.

It was by unexpected cause that eventually one day, I was able to get him down two flights of stairs and into the basement.

As I said, I'd been looking for trouble. And that trouble came in the form of Jackie. It had been a while since I'd allowed myself to think about her too intently, like I had at Funland and during the days after that.

She still hung out at the Forman's but she was here so much it was almost like she had taken the place of Forman. She spent almost every dinner at the Forman's didn't leave until she was tired and was ready for bed, and returned bright-eyed and cheery for breakfast the next morning. I supposed there was something to it, but I never asked, and was quite content in my notion that she was just Forman's replacement.

But then the other day she hadn't come for breakfast, and when she burst into the basement later that afternoon in her _cheerleading _uniform, it suddenly became a lot harder to compare her to Forman. I had swallowed down the sudden lump in my throat and convinced myself that I suddenly felt awake again because of the wicked burn she had on Forman about Leslie Cannon buying Red's Corvette.

But nonetheless, a week after that, I still ached for trouble, and one afternoon Jackie provided the perfect opportunity. It involved making special brownies, but there was more danger than that. If I had made them by myself, or even with Fez that would have been one thing, but teaching Jackie how to make them added a level of risk. It became a game, putting on my best air of indifference and fighting for self-control around her.

It was early. Seven-thirty in the morning. It was almost unsettling that Jackie was here before I had even woken up, and when I asked her why she was here she told me about her cancelled plans to make brownies with Mrs. Forman.

And as I told her, every burnout it America knew how to make brownies. The special kind, which is what then inspired my sudden whim to make special brownies.

"Alright, time to make some special brownies," I say as we walk into the kitchen and I find that Mrs. Forman had already set out all the ingredients on the counter.

"Careful," Jackie murmurs, coming up behind me. "Red's in there."

"Crap," I mumble, but smile anyway. Just another bit of trouble, which was exactly what I needed. "Alright, Mrs. Forman's recipe and everything. Okay, young grasshopper. Your first lesson was Zen, your second is brownies. Are you ready for this?"

Jackie crosses her arms, unpleased at the sudden turn of events. "Ugh, if this is anything like your 'Zen' lesson, then I might as well wait for Mrs. Forman."

"But will Mrs. Forman teach you how to make the special kind?" I negate.

She ponders briefly before deciding that I'm right. "Okay, fine. What do I do?"

"Here. Crack two eggs into the mixing bowl," I pass the eggs to her, anticipating her response.

"You're kidding right?" She shoves the cart of eggs back at me. "You're not going to make this easy, are you?"

"What's the fun in that?" I grin and move on to the next ingredient.

"But these are eggs. They came out of a chicken butt. I can't touch that," she says bluntly.

"But you have before," the words slip out of my mouth before I have time to register the fact that I shouldn't have said that aloud. I drop the butter in the mixing bowl and move on, hoping Jackie wouldn't notice.

But keenly, Jackie peers at me. "What? No I haven't. And how would you know if I did anyways?"

"Okay, same rules apply as your last lesson. No questions," I say quickly, covering my error. But then, deciding it wouldn't hurt, I add "And yeah, you have touched an egg before. Remember when you gave Kelso that egg to babysit? The one I broke? Right before the two of you got back together?"

"Yeah, well, I had been wearing gloves, and wait –you broke the egg?" she immediately moved to defend herself, but then realized my second slip, which I hadn't even noticed.

"Whoops, guess you didn't know that part," I can't help but grin. Getting myself in trouble was exactly what I needed. And with Jackie, who already hated me, it was a piece of cake.

"What?" she asks now, completely ignoring the brownies.

"Look, if you crack those eggs I'll tell you what happened," I tell her deciding that yes, this story would set her off.

I watch in amusement her tortured expression as she cracks two eggs in to the bowl and then makes a beeline for the sink to wash her hands.

"Kelso brought the egg to the basement and said we should pass it back and forth before he went and threw it at something. Then Donna showed up to tell him about your crazy plan. Lucky for me, I was holding the egg, and," I can't help but laugh at the image of Kelso's horrified look when the egg had cracked. So I add, "Come on, you'd do the same thing."

Jackie returns, her hands red from the scalding sink water, and I pass her the bowl to mix the ingredients. She pauses before responding. "Donna's got a big mouth. She always told me that I shouldn't get back together with Michael after he cheated on me, and then she went and increased his chances of getting back with me." Then she shakes her head and puts the bowl on the counter. "Okay. Enough talk about Michael. What's the next part of my lesson?"

"Go guard the door," I nod my head at it.

"What?" She asks, although she obeys my order.

"Really? What did I say about questions?" I can't help but roll my eyes. She was a terrible listener. I add the 'special ingredient' and then motion for her to come back to stir. "Now mix again. Quick."

I grab a soda from the fridge before sitting on the chair by the telephone and then give Jackie her next instruction.

"Now, lucky for you, Mrs. Forman already greased the brownie pan. I suspect that wouldn't have gone over well with you. Now all you have to do is pour the batter into the pan."

She pours the batter into the pan, and then I hand her a rubber spatula, instructing her of its purpose, and before I know it, our brownies are in the oven, and the element of trouble is gone…mostly.

While the brownies bake, we go back to the basement, and Jackie, with the timer right next to her face, quickly falls asleep on the couch. I pick up a magazine off of the table and anticipate her reaction when the timer wakes her up.

And sure enough, forty-two minutes later, the timer screams, sending Jackie bundling up the stairs to remove the brownies from the oven. I follow a few moments later and head up the stairs to see if I could, although it was unlikely, coax Forman to the basement for a special treat.

"Come on, Forman. Get up," I recite the usual commands at him as I find his hibernating body in the dark. I give him a good shove.

He doesn't even bother to respond to me this time, so I take an extra measure to actually shove him out of his bed. He doesn't fight it, and just drops to the floor like a sack of flour.

I find his ankles and actually go as far as dragging him, but although he weighs nothing, he's a dead weight on the ground, and he anchors his arms around one foot of his bed. Crap. I submit to calling Jackie for help.

She arrives a few moments later. "If you wanted my help all you had to do was ask," she points out, but she moves to grab his wrists from where he locked them around his bed.

I was incredibly surprised by the amount of strength Jackie held in those small arms, but upon further thought, I realized that it wasn't all that surprising, if you considered how feeble Forman was.

"Are we really going to carry him all the way to the basement?" Jackie grunts as we navigate him through the bedroom door.

"Absolutely. You and I have single-handedly prepared the antidote for Sleeping Beauty's infinite hibernation," I toss the words at her sarcastically.

We start down the first flight of stairs. Jackie blows a strand of hair out of her face and glares at me. "Sleeping Beauty was saved by true love's kiss, you idiot. _Not _by carrying her by the hands and feet by her friends to a _basement _to eat – "

"Put a sock in it," I say forcefully, as we make our way to Red's line of view. Jackie and I grin as we pass him as though there is nothing out of the ordinary. Red glares at us, and its clear in his eyes that he thinks we're all a bunch of dumbasses.

A bunch of dumbasses on dope, to be specific, which couldn't be more accurate.

Forman agrees to make the next flight of stairs to the basement on his own two feet, expressing annoyance at our comparing him to Sleeping Beauty, but before long, the three of us start a Circle of edibles.

It doesn't take long for Forman. "Man. My mom's right. Brownies make everything better."

I grin at him. It was like we'd raised him from the dead. "Or, as I like to say, _special_ brownies make everything better."

Jackie chimes in now. "Eric, your mom is so cool."

I focus my attention back on her. "Okay, last part of your lesson, young grasshopper. Look at Forman. Twenty minutes ago he was a lifeless lump his bed. See how the brownies have wakened him?"

But Forman is the one to respond. "Grasshopper, ha. Jackie you're a bug."

"Yeah," she ignores his comment and adds sarcastically, "He's so much better now."

"Hey, I could be moaning about Donna," Forman says, but then immediately begins to mope. Before I know it though, its like hitting a switch again. "Hyde, you've got brownie all over your face, man."

Well… "Okay, so he's not perfect. But he's better." I glance at Forman, shaking my head at him "It's a beard man, come on."

"Hmmm," Forman flips the switch again. "There's something missing here. Where's Fez?"

"He's at work. He works at a jewelry store," Jackie crosses her arms and sits back.

"And Jackie. Why are you being so nice?" Forman continues. I practically sneer.

"Okay, Eric. I think you've had too much brownie if you think I'm being nice," Jackie says, but she can't help but laugh.

"A lot's changed," I shrug my shoulders when Forman turns his attention to me.

"Well," Forman looks around. "It doesn't _look_ like anything has changed. We're still sitting in the Circle in my basement."

"Yeah, but we have changed," Jackie tells him, and any laughter in her voice has faded. She quickly focuses her attention on the ground, and after a moment she twists her mouth to the side. Then she stands.

"See you guys later," and without another word, she walks out the door, and its like she was never here to begin with.

Not ten minutes later Forman disappeared back up to his room. Alone again, I prop my feet up on the table but am immediately swarmed by the feeling of cabin fever. Again.

And truth be told, I had to do something. I had to distract my mind from itself lest it decide to wander. And if I let it wander, I might as well just give up right then.

My mind worked like a magnet. If not controlled, it gravitated toward the opposite pole. And I didn't care to admit it, but just like a magnet, my mind gravitated to the opposite pole. Always the opposite.

And that's what it had been doing for the past three nights. In my sleep, I lost all conscious grip on my mind, and damn it, it always wandered to the opposite pole.

And I couldn't get that dream out of my mind.


	5. What Is and What Will Never Be

Jackie was getting on my nerves. And what made it worse was the fact that she wasn't being annoying, she was just being plain stupid. And for some unfathomable reason, I decided to take it upon myself to correct her.

It started when she asked me why I cared that Forman was withering away in bed all summer. Never mind the fact that the guy was basically my brother…

"Why do you care so much? I mean, I'd understand why anybody else would care. But you're supposed to be the one with no emotions," she asked.

The thing was, I couldn't get upset over this thoughtless comment because she wasn't trying to be mean. She really believed what she was saying.

"It's true," she shrugs as though I've disputed her.

It wasn't worth it, I had to remind myself. If Jackie wanted to act this way, that was her problem, not mine. So instead of fueling her fire, I turn back to my magazine, signaling that I was not getting involved.

But the fact of the matter was, it freakin' mattered to me. Jackie has been naïve long enough and it was about time that she got her facts straight.

"Crap," the word sails through my lips as I toss the magazine back on the table, defeated. I think Jackie says something but I'm not sure. "What?" I ask her.

The part of me that was thinking properly knew I should have just let Jackie's comment go; that part of me knew she said that just so I'd respond in kind. But that part of me was quickly being overshadowed by the grating argument building like stones in my head.

Jackie speaks again, but this time I catch it. "Was that just one of those angry outbursts people like you get?"

"Jackie, what the hell are you talking about?" I sneer, irritated at her ability to randomly change topics.

"Okay," now she looks to be as fed up with me as I am with her. She tosses her magazine on the table, mocking me. "In our group, everyone categorically matches a different personality. As I was just saying before, Steven, you're the one with no emotions. You're the burnout. Me, I'm the shallow bitch. Eric is the spineless geek, Michael is the stupid one, Donna is the crazy feminist, and Fez is the confused foreign one," she ticks each one of our friends off on her fingers. "See?" she concludes

"You're not a shallow bitch," I say right away. I take a break, about ready to destroy every one of the stereotypes she has just listed, but then the fervor is lost.

"Yeah, I am. And I've come to accept it," she says, but she doesn't sound all that happy about it.

And that's it. Jackie was obnoxious, bossy, domineering…all of the above, but a bitch she was not. She was the easiest book to read, and if anybody just bothered looking, they'd realized that all Jackie wanted was acceptance; to fit in. It's was the sole reason I had put up with all her crap for all these years, because for some strange reason, she had picked this band of misfits to fit in with and be accepted by. I was enough of a human being to respect that, however begrudgingly.

"Oh, no. No. You a_ct _like a shallow bitch, but I can tell that all the things that you say that may be classified that way you don't actually mean. You pretend to be a bitch, but you aren't in actuality. In reality, there's a lot more gray than in your black and white version."

As I expected, Jackie actually seems earnestly surprised that I knew this. "Go on," she says after a moment.

So I continue. "Yes, you're right that I'm the burnout. But as you observed, I do care about Forman. He's like the brother I never had. I'm not heartless," I can't believe I'm telling her this, but I know that its to teach her a lesson.

"And as for Forman. Yeah, he's a spineless weakling who loves Star Wars way too much, but if that's all he cared about, he wouldn't be spending all summer locked up in his room.

"Kelso is incredibly stupid, but he also knows how to have fun more than anyone that I know. Donna may be a crazy feminist, but her intentions are good and she's smart. And Fez – "

Fez walks through the door to the basement now, as though he is a trained dog being summoned by its owner. I shoot him a wicked grin. "Well yeah. Fez really is just that horny, confused foreigner."

"Right you are, amigo," Fez agrees amicably, not even caring to know why we are talking about him.

I face forward now, picking my magazine back up off the table.

"I suppose I should be getting to work," Fez says, although he moves to sit in the lawn chair.

I glance up at him, and see that he has made no intention to get out of his chair. He glances at me guiltily. I raise my eyebrows at him and he nods sadly.

He rises. "So…I guess I should get going?" he says, but it's more of a question.

"Tell you what man. We'll come and visit you in the middle of your shift," I suggest, and Fez nods.

"Yeah, and I'll put in a good word about you with Stephanie," Jackie promises.

"Ooh, what word?" Fez asks, suddenly excited.

"What?" Jackie frowns, confused by his question.

"What?" Fez is confused now too.

I find this all hysterical. "Fez. What Jackie means is that she'll tell Stephanie some good things about you."

"Oh…so not just one word?" Fez asks.

"Right."

After a few more encouragements, and a threat that he might be late for work and Fenton will take over and establish dominance, Fez finally rushes out the door.

I try to focus on my magazine again for the hundredth time, but I can't seem to focus. I glance at Jackie out of the corner of my eye. She hasn't said anything about what we talked about before Fez came in, and now although she faces the TV, her eyes on the floor and about a million miles away.

Well, that was something.

I don't know why it matters, but at least I got her thinking.

Mrs. Forman calls us up for dinner. I give up on the magazine.

o-o-o

We make our way through the mall, Jackie leading the way toward "All That Glitters" where Fez works. It's almost 8 o'clock, which is when Fez said he usually got to take a break when he worked the evening shift.

The mall isn't very crowded, but it's still slow-going, following Jackie, because she wants to stop in every shop. I begin to lose my patience, because I don't know where the jewelry store is myself, otherwise I'd just let her shop.

We pass by a men's clothing department store, and I think we're going to pass this, but Jackie swings through the entrance of this shop too.

"Jackie!" I groan, reaching to drag her out, but she's too quick.

"Okay. Stephanie likes sophisticated men, so what if we got Fez some sweater vests?" She glances at me, but answers her own question. "Nah, but Fez already has enough sweater vests. What else?" she moves further into the store.

Having no other choice, I follow. I don't even try to fight her on this. It was easier to just let her run her course.

"Less tight pants, _that's _what Fez needs," Jackie nods, and then darts to the right. "Do you want any pants Steven?" she asks, making her way between the racks. "I'll even buy you jeans if that's what you really want."

"Jackie. You're not buying me pants," I say incredulously. I glance at my watch. "Or Fez for that matter. Come on. We have to go. Fez should be on his break now."

"Fine!" Jackie surrenders, and marches out the store.

Finally.

We don't stop in anymore shops, thankfully, and Jackie leads us right to the jewelry store.

"I guess that's where that Fenton guy must work," she points toward the store bordering the one where Fez works.

"Huh. So it's really _right_ next door to the jewelry store. So, if Fenton works there, then he's a step ahead of Fez in the competition," I think out loud as we head into the jewelry store.

"What competition?" Jackie glances at me.

"For that chick. Sophie, or something? His boss?" I look around for Fez. I see him and move in his direction.

"But Fez said that Fenton said _Stephanie_ wasn't his type," Jackie points out.

"That's a load of crap," I tell her, shaking my head. "If she's got boobs then she's any guy's type."

"What?" Jackie's the one to shake her head now. "You are so gross."

I stop before we reach Fez, who hasn't noticed us yet. "It's the truth. Okay, before we go see Fez, which one is she?" Jackie points. "Do you know her?"

Jackie gives me a look that tells me that was a stupid question. "I am Stephanie Hilt's favorite customer."

"Of course," I shouldn't be surprised. "Okay, we're going to help Fez. Go talk to her while I prep Fez," I push her off toward the boss-girl, and make my way over to Fez.

"Hyde," Fez smiles when he sees me approach. He is standing behind a case of diamond bracelets, and he steps out from behind it. "Fenton's not here right now."

"Well, that's good, because Jackie and I are going to set you up with Stephanie."

"What? Right now?" Fez asks suddenly anxious.

"Well, yeah. You're on your break now, right? It's eight."

Fez wipes his palms against his pants. "I suppose…" his eyes dart across the room until they find Stephanie and Jackie chatting away on the other side of the store.

"Look man, you got this, okay?" I pat him on the shoulder. "Just be yourself…or well, don't do that exactly," I think for a moment. "Just be charming, or…something." Then I give him a little shove and move back to the front of the store. Jackie joins me a few moments later.

We watch as Fez and his boss interact, as though we are researchers observing a study. It almost feels ridiculous, but then Fez signals us with a hi-five, which in and of itself was pretty impressive.

"Yes!" Jackie does a little dance.

I can't help but share some of that joy. "You know, Fez could be such a ladies man if he wasn't such a…" I falter.

"Confused foreigner?" Jackie quips, referring to earlier.

I can't help but smile. "Exactly."

And although I wasn't sure quite when it happened, I suddenly knew that I was somehow friends with Jackie Burkhart.

o-o-o

Mr. and Mrs. Forman left early the next morning, somehow managing to drag Forman along with them. When I get to the kitchen, I see that Mrs. Forman left me a note telling me of their whereabouts – they went to visit Aunt Pearl – as well as letting me know that she left me some French toast in the oven warmer.

I immediately scarf down the French toast, and head into the living room, basking in this brief moment of solitude. But I've barely turned on the TV and sat down on the couch before Jackie flies through the door from the kitchen.

"Where is everyone?" she makes a face and joins me on the other side of the couch.

"Oh, what the hell?" I groan. "Why aren't you at home, sleeping like a normal teenager?"

She simply sticks her tongue out at me before focusing her attention on the TV.

But I keep pushing. I couldn't get a few damn hours of quiet anymore.

"Why are you _always _here? No matter how badly you hope, Donna and Kelso aren't here anymore."

She shoots me a venomous look. "I'm not here for them."

"Then why are you here?"

"Because my friends are here," she says like its obvious.

"I just said – "

"_You're _my friend, Steven," Jackie rolls her eyes. "And so is Fez, but Fez isn't always here like you are."

"Then why don't you go bother Fez?" I say through clenched teeth. The question is dangerous; no matter what she says, I won't like the answer.

Jackie just shrugs, pulling a couch pillow close to her chest. "'Cause I want to hang out with you."

o-o-o

Forman and I were standing in front of the trophy display case outside of the gym, waiting for the bell to ring after PE.

"Hey, so did Jackie tell you?" Forman drags his shoe across the floor, leaving a dark scuff mark. "Her dad got us all tickets to the Rundgren concert this weekend in Kenosha."

"Jackie doesn't even like Rundgren," I say, confused.

"Yeah, but I guess somebody gave them to her dad, and he gave them to us, so yeah," Forman shrugs. "There's four tickets, so we should invite someone."

The bell rings and everyone shuffles out into the hallway. Neither Forman nor I make any intention to follow.

"Oh, and I almost forgot the best part," Forman says animatedly. "Shannon is going to be there."

"Shannon from math class?" I ask, glancing at him.

Forman nods, and opens his mouth, but then a soft whimpering sound interrupts him. He pauses, and the sound continues.

"Help," I hear faintly. It sounds like its coming from the supply closet. "Amedicans, please help me."

"What was that?" Forman makes a face.

I point to the supply closet and then reach for the door. There, hanging like a coat, is some kid I don't recognize holding a dodgeball. "Oh. Hello," he smiles weakly.

"Who the hell are you?" I say.

"I'm the new foreign exchange student. The football team asked me if I wanted to hang out," he looks down, pondering. "I shouldn't have said yes. I can't feel my legs."

Another poor soul used as fodder for those fatheaded jocks. I shake my head and help him down.

"Look, if those jocks try and do this to you again, just, come find me," I tell him, not appreciating the football team's practical joke.

However, no good deed goes unpunished, because immediately the kid adheres to me like glue. I turn to Forman.

"What if we take him to the concert?" I suggest, because I really do feel kind of bad for this kid.

Forman appraises this strange foreign kid, but eventually nods. "Why not?"

Later that day though, the news of our fourth companion didn't go over so well with Jackie.

Forman and I arrived at the Hub before she did after school, but no more than five minutes later she bursts through the front door and pulls up a chair at our table.

"So, I was thinking about who to ask to come to the concert with us this weekend, and I was thinking – "

"Too late. Hyde already invited Fez," Forman cuts her off, referring to the nickname we coined for the foreign kid.

Jackie glances back and forth between the two of us. "Who's Fez?"

"He's the new foreign exchange student at our school," I explain. "He's cool," I reassure her.

"What did we exchange for him?" she begins to pout and I know she's going to her unhappy place. Crap.

"What?" Forman asks.

Jackie just rolls her eyes and shakes her head. "Never mind," then she faces me. "You only invited him because you know I don't like anything foreign."

I give her a look that tells her she's being ridiculous, but its not all that far off. I definitely would do something like this to piss her off, just not this time. But it w_as _easy to piss off Jackie. Just as it was easy for her to annoy Forman and me. It was the only way our friendship worked.

Forman and I had been friends almost longer then I remembered. He was that first friend you make when you start school as a little kid, and I was the same for him. Now, juniors in high school, we were practically brothers.

We met Jackie toward the end of grade school. I had been hanging out with Forman at his house when his parents had invited the City Councilman over for dinner one night and they had brought along their daughter who was one year younger than us. We had been told to be nice to her, and as it turned out she didn't have very many friends, so she took to us right away. She hasn't left since.

Needless to say, we put up with her and she put up with us. But at the end of the day, it was just nice to have people to go home to.

Not needing to remind Jackie of any of this, or why Fez might need some friends too, I focus my attention back on Forman.

"Did Red give you the Vista Cruiser?" I ask him now. He nods. "Great. So we have wheels for this weekend."

As it would turn out, however, although we had wheels for getting to the concert, we didn't have a battery. Or well, we did, but according to the mechanic it was 'ten years old and shot to hell.' To make matters worse, none of us had enough money to buy a new battery, and we weren't supposed to take the car out of town so we couldn't call our parents. We were stuck.

However, the mechanic was 'gracious' enough to give us a new battery in exchange for two of our concert tickets. And then one question remained. Who wasn't going to the concert?

"Fez," Jackie quickly suggests. But before I can reprimand her she holds up her hand and looks down. "No. Fez, you should go. I don't even like Rundgren. I'll give up my ticket."

We all fall silent as Jackie looks down at her feet and crosses her arms. But a moment later, she snaps her head back up, a sudden fire burning in her eyes. She smiles like a deviant.

"But one of you has to give up your ticket too, if we're going to get a battery," she barks at Forman and me.

She was right, and I turn to face Forman, ready to fight for the ticket. He turns to me, a mirror image of determination written across his features. Neither of us says anything; it's a standoff of who can hold out the longest.

And man, did I want the ticket. Only an idiot – or Jackie – would pass up an opportunity like this. But I knew Forman wasn't an idiot, and was just as eager for the ticket as I was.

But the thing was, there was more than just a chance to see Rundgren live for Forman. Shannon from math was in there, the girl he'd had a crush on since junior high.

I breathe in deep and then sigh out slowly. Something flashes in Forman's eyes and he knows he's won.

"Crap. I'm out," I wave my hand dismissively. "Shannon's in there, and I know you were looking forward to seeing her."

"Thanks Hyde," Forman claps me on the shoulder.

"Yeah," I shrug him off. "Get bent."

Had I known, however, that I'd spend the next few hours driving Forman's boat of a car next to a resentful Jackie who wouldn't shut up about how we had no money to go do anything, as if I didn't already know, I would have thought twice about giving Forman a shot with Shannon.

It was only made worse by the fact that I eventually had to pull the Cruiser back into the parking lot so that we'd have enough gas to get back home, especially since stopping at a gas station was out of the question at this point.

"Great," Jackie crosses her arms. "Now we can't even cruise. What now?"

"We could sneak in," I suggest, knowing full well that I'd probably get hit for saying that.

"Are you insane?" she hits the back of my head, as expected.

"No," I say slowly. Then I add, "And I'm serious."

"We're not sneaking in," she yells incredulously.

"Whatever," I mumble.

"Hey, its not my fault we had to take this crappy car," she points out, not politely. "If we had taken Daddy's Lincoln, we'd be in there too. And if it weren't for Daddy, Eric and Fez wouldn't be in there at all."

"I know," I admit, although I was still contemplating our chances of getting caught if we tried to get in there.

Jackie leans over and turns on the radio, and immediately the lyrics of "I Saw the Light" pour out of the speakers.

"Well, that's something," Jackie leans back. "Rundgren."

I chuckle and shake my head in dismay. "You know, it was really nice of you to give up your ticket for Fez," I admit.

Jackie stares off in the distance, but shrugs after a moment. "I'm not _that_ cold-hearted," she says half-heartedly. Then, as if an afterthought, "I don't know. I figured he deserved it and he needs friends. I know what its like to have no friends, and it sucks.

"And, hey. It was nice of you to give Forman the chance to see Shannon. I'm enough of a bitch that I wouldn't have sacrificed my ticket for _that_," she says.

"I know," I can't help the small smile that creeps up on my lips.

"Hey. You're not supposed to _agree_ with me!" She smiles now too, and swings her arm to hit me. I catch her before she makes contact, curling my fingers around her wrist. "But at least I'm not alone," she adds quietly.

Without taking a moment to think twice about it, I lean down and kiss her, wrapping my free hand behind her head. It lasts only a moment, and then I am pulling away, a million alarming thoughts colliding in my head.

But immediately, with her free hand, Jackie grabs the front of my shirt and pulls me back over her, banishing all those thoughts to silence.

Those thoughts never came back. And Jackie and I never went back.

After that night, we were always together. Even though I fought with her that I hated the idea of prom, I still dressed up and took my girlfriend who simply wanted to go to junior prom as a sophomore. When my mom left, Jackie did everything in her power to help me as my only confidant, even once Forman found out and his family took me in.

Forman began seeing Shannon after that night too, but at the end of the day when she was with her friends, he always came back, never forgetting about his friends.

Fez became our fourth addition, and suddenly we were the four misfits instead of three. Together, the four of us painted the water tower, spent a wild weekend in Vanstock, lost our beer to Canadian Mounties, and survived another prom but with the added bonus of a tornado. We lived life to its max, all its ups and downs, the four of us.

Forman, me and Jackie, and Fez.

o-o-o

And then at the end of junior year, after a long, brutal and nasty break up between Forman and Shannon that the rest of us thought wouldn't last, Shannon and her family up and moved halfway across the country to California.

Forman spent every day in bed after that. Fez got a job that summer, and suddenly it was just me and Jackie again, like at the night of the concert.

But this is where everything seemed to line up almost exactly with reality. The dream world where Donna and Kelso never existed was beginning to _become_ reality, and that's what scared the hell out of me the most. (1)

o-o-o

"'Cause I want to hang out with you," is what Jackie says now, sitting across from me on the couch.

If I read anything into that dream, I knew that I would have a problem with this, but I refused believe that there was anything to read into.

So I just nod my head. "Alright."

o-o-o-o-o

Footnotes:

1 – In this dream sequence that Hyde has, I explore what were to happen if Donna and Kelso never existed in the first place. I find a way to work Jackie back into the story, because I hate to admit it, but if it weren't for Kelso, she might've never been friends with any of them. In this 'alternate' reality (aka, Hyde's dream), Hyde and Eric still find Jackie annoying, and vice versa, but this mutual annoyance is more affectionate. Because Kelso was never around to bring out the worst in Jackie, there is less animosity between Jackie and Hyde, as well as less inhibitions for when they finally get together in this dream world. I play a little bit with Eric too, and what were to happen if he had never met Donna, and with this weaker relationship with Shannon, I hoped to show what a really great and strong relationship Eric and Donna have. I also wanted Hyde's dream to slowly line up with reality to show that what very well could have been is actually coming to fruition. This dream is really vivid and logical, which dreams often aren't, and Hyde is going to reflect on this later on, but right now he's still in the denial stage, which we all knew he is good at. But most of all, I just really enjoyed writing this, and all the opportunity it provided for my JH zennie mind to explore. ;)

One more point: In episode 4.20 (Class Picture), we see how they meet Fez when they find him in the supply closet with the gym equipment. I changed it slightly to omit Kelso, but I made this scene line up closely with the Rundgren concert (which I also manipulated to omit Kelso and Donna) that they go to see in the very first episode of the show because in the first episode, the script is written to suggest that Fez is still new to America and that he is a new member to their group.


End file.
